My hope for this years Lent is simple. It is that I would be convicted of my sin and turn more completely over to Jesus. I find myself compromising on things now that I never would have before in my walk with Jesus. I find myself justifying more things, questioning more things and even having less integrity than I know I should have.
The other day I was in a time of singing and worship with a small group from church. We were singing a song about Jesus (duh) and I felt like God was asking me to close my eyes and stop singing. I did this and what popped our in front of my closed eyes was a picture of two friends that I have known for a long time. Their faces were clear, it was like I could reach out and touch them. I asked what it meant and I heard these words. “Phil, you are ashamed of me. You close your eyes during worship and you don’t see me, you see the things that are keeping you from me.” I started weeping. I wept from my gut, a good old fashioned shaking kind of weeping, but it didn’t feel good, it felt deep and full of regret.
So, this year during Lent I ask that Jesus would break my heart for Him and the things that break His heart. I ask that the Holy Spirit would convict me of my sin and my sinful nature. I ask for a renewal in my heart and mind towards Jesus and his word. I have chosen this life of following Jesus and I dare not be luke warm with it.
