Since January of 2016 I have found myself in a new season of life, one that is different than the last 23 years that I have worked in missions with YWAM. I have always worked under a YWAM operating location, in LA, Seattle, San Diego, and Kona (we have lived in some pretty sweet places). In 2016, we moved from Kona and the YWAM Ships location, to San Diego, to start a new chapter as Steps of Justice and YWAM.
The past 16 months have been filled with beauty, difficulty, loneliness, prosperity, doubt and joy. I am thinking out loud here, as that is the way I process best, but stick with me, I’m going somewhere. Let me break down the last 16 months in more detail (talking strictly about ministry, not family. Family is for another post). Below I will share how things have been, and use the word “I” to refer to me and “we” to refer to Steps of Justice and the YWAM ministry that I run.
- There has been so much beauty that I have seen over the past 16 months. I have seen new ministries started, like our friends of Syria events and the Syrian drop in center that I have co-led on a weekly basis. I have met amazing people, who have believed in me, stood by me, inspired me and motivated me. We, as Steps of Justice, hosted our first urban team this past year, and we are seeing more trips to Cambodia than we have in a while.
- These past 16 months have also been difficult. I feel alone in a lot of ways. I am trying to get things running, and ministries started, and that is happening, but I feel alone in it. I have spent years working in team, but these past 16 months has been working alone, and trying to build and find teams to work in.
- This has been a year of prosperity. Not just financial, but also missional and ministry prosperity. We live in an expensive city, intentional because of the relationships we have here and the opportunity to work with the refugee community. We have seen our support grow since moving here, and have had other ways of making money that has really helped us save more and give more. There has also been prosperity in ministry, as we have seen our work with the refugee community grow, have been able to host teams in San Diego and Cambodia and have had open doors to work in a school made up of mainly refugees and immigrants. God has opened doors we didn’t even know existed.
- I have had a lot of doubt these past 16 months. Not doubt in my faith, or in the work that I am doing, but doubt in the decision to move my family to San Diego, into a pioneering situation and out of the established ministry context that we were with in Kona. I have had doubt in the loneliness and in the difficult times. The doubt is peppered with the reality that God is blessing us, but it is a different season than I am used to.
- In all of it, I have had tremendous joy. Ever since I was 10 I have wanted to work in missions. I have had a desire to show people who Jesus is, and His love for them. I have spent most of my missions career training others to be missionaries, but this season has been one where I have seen my mission dreams come true. I have dear friends who do not love the Lord. They are not my projects, they are not my newsletter material, they are my friends. I have relationships with people who are not followers of Jesus and those relationships run deep. I am as committed to these relationships as any relationship in my life.
I am not sure how much I will continue to write about this season, but I hope a lot, as it helps me process and learn. If your reading this, your prayers are appreciated.
Peace
