It is October 12, 2018, day 20. I am writing a bit each day about my thoughts, motivations, ideas and dreams.
Home, I am not even sure where that is anymore, but I do know that I have left it a lot over the past 23 years. Lately I have been longing for home, longing to go back to it, but not knowing where it is. Earlier this year I was flying back from Cambodia when the thought of home came into my head and heart. I The longing for home was stronger than it has ever been. I was walking through the airport on my layover and so wanted to go home, but couldn’t figure out where that was. Home to me, and my family, is where the people are who are closest to us. Home is mom and dad in Canada. Home is friends and God parents in Seattle. Home is our community in Hawaii, where we lived for three years. The only place that doesn’t feel like home right now is where we currently live.
Today I was reading in the Celtic Daily Prayer, and here is what it said:
“Whatever the reason, many of the early Christian Celts shared the desire to travel. in contrast to the red martyrdom of givings one’s life up for Christ, or the green martyrdom of participating in severe penitential practices, they faced the white martyrdom of living years far from home and hearth for the sake of the gospel. The Celts had a specific word, hiraeth, for the extreme yearning for home associated with this latter form of martyrdom; because of their deep love of family. It was considered the hardest of all to endure. Beginning with St. Patrick, Celtic missionaries chose this way of life our of deep devotion to Christ. Edward Sellner, Wisdom of the Celtic Saints.
This passage rings deep with my longing to go home. It rings deep with where I am currently at in feeling like I am not home. I know that this is where we are supposed to be in our journey right now, but it is not easy. The above passage puts words to my situation, which helps a lot.
Dallas Willard says, “Obedience is an essential outcome of Christian spiritual formation.” This is how I continually try to live, in obedience to Him and his prompting on my life. It is not always easy, in fact it is filled with hardship and difficulty, but my family and I will continue to walk in obedience to Christ, until He calls us home.